In this day and age where social media makes everything seem all shiny and new, each and every one of us have become on the lookout for perfection. We have become obsessed with seamless, perfect things. In our pursuit for perfection, we have somewhat forgotten the value of what we have and what these things mean to us.
The Typical Faultfinder
You can easily spot a faultfinder in your family, your social group, or your community. These are the people who always want everything to look just right. They don’t just want neatness and orderliness; rather, they aim for perfection in their lives and in the lives of the people around them. Mothers want their children to have perfect scores in their exams. Employers want perfection in the performance of their employees. Husbands and wives want their partners to be perfect’ they want their relationships to be perfect. The problem here is that the pursuit for perfection is making us forget the value of what we have. We belittle the good things that we have because we are always thinking of what it lacks. For us, there is always something missing.
Being a faultfinder is common but it does not mean that it is normal. This way of thinking can also be addictive. It can destruct good relationships because of its very nature of seeking out the faults even when there are many positive sides to something. When you fail to notice the silver lining in every situation and just focus on the bad things, the negativity will drag you down. Worse, these feelings of negativity will also dampen the spirit of the people around you and more often than not,m they could also hurt the feelings of the people you love.
You and your Expectations
For the most part, it is okay to have expectations and to keep your standards high. Without these standards, you will not have anything tangible to aim at and that will not do you a lot of good. But setting expectations that are too high, which are difficult to achieve, could strain relationships and push people away. If you are a faultfinder, you need to know how to control being one. Some of the things you could do include learning to appreciate, finding the root of the problem, and getting over resentments and past events.
Learn to appreciate.
The first step to stop being a faultfinder is to learn to appreciate the brighter side of life. While problems and difficulties come your way, you still need to recognise the good things in your life and be thankful for them.
Find the root of the problem.
If you look around you and see that the negative things outweigh the positive things, this could probably mean that your obsession with perfection has become more serious. Try finding the root of the problem of your distress and address that. It might help to alleviate the negativity that is weighing you down.
Get over resentments and past events.
Last but not the least, make sure you are not comparing your life to others. You have your own journey and you have your own pace. Do not keep checking back on others because that will only make you feel discontent with your life. Focus on your own journey and enjoy every minute of it.
Being a faultfinder could hinder your happiness and inner peace. Let go of the things that make you unhappy and live a more fruitful and positive life. Start by unlearning being a faultfinder.
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